Forum Botosani

[DON_SEM@K@]

Why do niggers stink?
So blind people can hate them too.

What do you get when you cross a nigger and a spic?
Someone too lazy to steal.

Why don't niggers take aspirin?
They refuse to pick the cotton out.

What do nigger kids get for Christmas?
Your bike.

What's a niggers idea of foreplay?
"Don't scream or I'll cut you, bitch."

Why do spics drive low-riders?
So they can cruise and pick lettuce at the same time.

What do you get when you cross a jew and a gypsy?
A chain of empty retail stores.

Why don't nigger kids play in the sandbox?
Cats keep covering them up.

What do you call an apartment full of niggers?
A COON-dominium.

Why are there no nigger astronauts?
Their lips explode at 50,000 feet.

How do you babysit a niglet?
Wet his lips and stick him to the wall.

How do you get him down?
Teach him to say "Motherfucker."

How else do you babysit a niglet?
Put Velcro on the ceiling and tell him to jump.

How do you get him down?
Invite the spics over, blindfold them and tell them it's a piñata party.

Why do jews have big noses?
Air is free.

What is a nigger on a bike?
Thief.

What's long and black and smells like shit?
The welfare line.

What do you call 50 niggers at the bottom of the ocean?
Good start.

What is the worst 3 years of a niggers life?
First grade.

How was break dancing invented?
Niggers trying to steal hubcaps from moving cars.

Why do niggers keep chickens in their back yards?
To teach their kids how to walk.

How do you know Adam and Eve were not black?
You ever try to take a rib from a nigger?

What is a nigger?
Proof that skunks fuck monkeys.

What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead nigger in the road?
The dead dog has skid marks in front of it.

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk?
"I set WHO free?"

Why are chimps always frowning?
They know in a million years they are going to turn into niggers.

Why is interrogating a Mexican like a pool ball?
The harder you hit it the more English you get.

How many jews can you fit in a VolksWagon?
All of them if you put them in the ashtray.

A nigger and a spic jump off the Empire State Building, who hits the ground first?
Who cares.

A nigger and a spic jump off the Empire State Building, who hits the ground first?
The spic, because the nigger had to stop on the way down and spray paint "motherfucker" on the wall.

Why don't spics have barbeques?
The beans keep falling through the grill.

You hear about the new car made in Israel?
Not only can it stop on a dime, it will go back and pick it up.

What do you call an Ethiopian with a pickle on his head?
A quarter-pounder.

How many Ethiopians can you fit in a phone booth?
All of them.

How do you start a foot race in Ethiopia?
Roll a doughnut down the street.

How many niggers does it take to pave a driveway?
One if you spread him real thin.

How do you blindfold a chink?
Dental floss.

How do chinks name their kids?
They throw silverware down the stairs.

What's the difference between a nigger and a bag of shit?

The bag.


What's the most confusing day in Harlem?
Father's Day.

When does a Black man turn into a nigger?
As soon as he leaves the room.

What do you call a nigger with a Harvard education?
Nigger.

What do you call a nigger in a courtroom in a 3 piece suit?
The defendant.

There is a nigger and a spic in a car, who's driving?
The cop.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling?
He doesn't know he's black.

How long does it take a nigger bitch to take a shit?
9 months.

Why don't nigger women wear panties to picnics?
To keep the flies off the chicken.

Why does Alabama have niggers and California have earthquakes?
California got first pick.

Why do Mexican cars have those little steering wheels?
So they can drive handcuffed.

Why are niggers like sperm?
Only one in a million actually work.

What do you call Mike Tyson with no arms?
Niger nigger nigger.

How do you fit 100 Cubans in a shoe box?
Tell them its a raft.

Why do police dogs lick their ass?
To get the taste of nigger out of their mouth.

What can a pizza do that a nigger can't?
Feed a family of four.

Why did the nigger carry a piece of shit in his wallet?
I.D.

What is red green yellow orange purple and pink?
A nigger dressed for church.

Why do niggers have flat noses?
That's where god put his feet when he was pulling off their tails.

Did you hear that the KKK bought the movie rights to Roots?
They're going to play it backwards so it has a happy ending.

What is the difference between a white owl and a black owl?
A white owl goes, "Who, who," a black owl goes, "Who dat? Who dat?"

Did you hear about the new Black Barbie?
It comes with 12 kids, AIDS and a welfare check.

What is black, white, and rolls off the end of the pier?
A nigger and a seagull fighting over a chicken wing.

What do you get when you cross a nigger with a gorilla?
A dumb gorilla.

What is the difference between Batman and a black man?
Batman can go out at night without Robin.

Did you hear about the new Chap Stick for niggers?
It comes in a spray can.

What's the difference between niggers and pit-bulls?
It's still legal to own a pit-bull.

What do you say to a black man in uniform?
"I'll have a Big Mac with cheese and a coke."

Why do niggers walk the way they do?
Because they spent the first nine months of their lives dodging a coat hanger.

What happened when the Ethiopian fell in the crocodile pit?
He ate six crocs before they could pull him out.

Why do niggers call white people "honkies"?
That's the last sound they hear before the white people run them over.

How do you stop a nigger from going out?
Pour more gas on him.

Did you hear about the nigger with insomnia?
He kept waking up twice a week.

What do you do if you run over a nigger?
Reverse.

Why do decent white folks shop at nigger yard sales?
To get all their stuff back.

Who were the three most famous women in black history?
Aunt Jemima, Diana Ross, and Mother Fucker!

Hear about the new bumper sticker that says "Run, Jesse, Run"?
You put it on the front of your car.

What do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles have in common?
They're both niggers.

How come Stevie Wonder & Ray Charles can't read?
They're both niggers.

[Pablo]

ba nene... da ai postat o data pentru o saptamana

[Stefilicy]

Dan_Sem@k@, te rog frumos, termina cu rasismele, da? Si, in al doilea rand te rog sa nu te referi la negri cu "niggers". Nimanui nu-i place un smart ass white trash!

bancul:

Q: How do you call an intelligent blonde?
A: Golden Retriever

Three drunks in a park, one holding a bottle. Another one asks:

"Is that Wembley?"

"No, it's Thurday."

"Me too, let's go get a drink!"

[rock_it]

ce rasist esti mah....xenofobule...du-te akasa...pls..nu e logik sa te portzi asha

[Pablo]

ba.. un lucru e clar.. tre sa invat engleza... ca tot il certati pe saracu baiat si eu nu pricep de ce.. bine ca nici nu am incercat sa citesc bancurile alea )

[conyx]

Daca suntem la sectiunea BANCURI, si nu putem spune bancuri cu negri pentru ca nu e "politically correct", poate ar fi bine sa precizati ce fel de bancuri e voie sa fie postate aici.

Sa vedem, daca e sa nu jignim pe cineva, nu putem spune bancuri cu:

- negri, pentru s-ar interpreta ca e rasism,
- evrei, ca e antisemitism,
- unguri, ca e sovinism,
- tigani, ca e minoritate asuprita si nu intram in UE,
- musulmani, ca suparam Orientul,
- crestini si Dumnezeu, ca suparam Vaticanul, si crestinii habotnici,
- blonde si femei, pentru ca am fi misogini,
- animale, pentru ca se supara asociatiile pentru protectia animalelor,
- politie, pentru ca ...(adica nu, la asta nu se supara nimeni de pe forumul asta)
- ingineri, prostituate, tzarani, emigranti, eschimosi - pentru ca oricum ai da-o, cineva se va simti ca facand parte din una din categoriile respective sau avand oarece sentimente pentru acestea

Si-atunci? Ce fel de bancuri ne raman? A, ne raman bancurile cu romani, putem sa radem de Bula cat dorim, atat timp cat nu-l mai implicam pe prietenul lui Strul sau Itic(care sunt evrei dupa nume).

Hai sa fim seriosi, ideea de baza a unui banc, e sa faci o gluma care sa intzepe, macar putin, chiar si numai pentru a starni un zambet, chiar daca nu se aplica realitatii (deci faptul ca pe Bula, roman de origine, nu l-a tinut...penisul, sa duca galeata pana la etajul 10 in bancul cu pricina nu supara pe nici unul dintre conationalii lui).

In schimb preluam si noi de la straini, conceptul de "politically correct" si-l ducem la fel de departe, pentru a ne da civilizati cat de cat. Dar va intreb, cum de nu s-au scandalizat americanii in urma serialului Seinfeld sau oricare altul, fiecare dintre ele luand la bani marunti aproape fiecare comunitate, minoritate, natiune (episodul cu pakistanezul, sau cu poneii polonezilor).

Poate pentru ca, asa cum spunea Paul Rodriguez intr-un show comic pe Comedy Central, inaintasii lor au luptat prea mult pentru a obtine tocmai libertatea cuvantului, "free speech", ca sa nu poti spune o gluma, indiferent ca e legata de Dumnezeu, Papa, Bin Laden, Bush, negri, catei sau blonde.

Suntem totusi la sectiunea BANCURI si nu la o intrunire oficiala sau pe un forum unde discutam SERIOS problemele drepturilor omului, ale minoritatilor, femeilor sau animalelor.

Daca asta nu se intelege, inseamna ca e posibil sa fiti foarte stresati in viata cotidiana, incat sa nu va puteti relaxa citind un BANC (care nu e o teza cu caracter de adevar si generalitate).

Sa va spun un banc cu grasi? Sau va veti simti ofensati?

Ok, o sa ma gandesc la un banc cu panselutze si bondari...

[Pablo]

bine zis..

[Anthos]

Maimult decat bine zis!

[conyx]

O prietena a tinut sa precizeze ca, pentru corectitudinea informatiei, mai avem si bancuri cu Alinuta si bancuri cu moldoveni.

Nu stiu despre bancurile cu Alinutza, dar sigur n-as vrea sa-i supar pe moldoveni...

[conyx]

Cine face bancurile?

Ati facut vreodata un banc care sa ajunga "in the wild", ca virusii? Cine face legaturile alea atat de ciudate de te pufneste rasul cand auzi un banc? Cred ca, daca s-ar putea face un sondaj de opinie, rezultatul ar fi de genul celor cu accidentele de masina: "La fiecare 3 minute, undeva in lume, se publica un banc bun".

Se spune ca serviciile secrete din Vest aveau sarcina in razboiul rece sa submineze autoritatea ...autoritatilor statelor comuniste, creind...bancuri. Bancuri despre Ceausescu, de exemplu, despre Securitate, despre Calin.

Stie cineva cine l-a creat pe Bula?

Din cate stiu, bancurile cu Alinutza au fost facute dupa revolutie, iar creatorul personajului Alinutza este Marius Ursache, caricaturist pe vremea aceea la publicatia Bomba, un fel de Academia Catavencu ieseana. Publica benzi desenate cu Alinutza si fratele ei, Cloud Dancer (cel putin asa scria pe tricoul lui).